Sometimes I wonder if I am missing my life because of my practice. Intellectually I know my practice is not separate from my life, but physically and emotionally it feels like practice is something I go and do and then return to my life.
I know this not to be the truth. I know the truth is that all things are practice, it's just we don't always show up where we are. John Tarrant's current piece at Zenosaurus, which is also in the new book, The Book of Mu, points to my dilemma when he says,
" Adjusting our states of mind is a gymnastic work out that never ends. Our minds are still in beta and we live at some distance from our actual lives"
There are times when I believe that what I need to do is to let go of all the reading, all the zazen and anything else that has to do with a "spiritual" life and just live my life.
But I know this is not the way either.
So, is it this or is it that?
MU to both.
It's both and none.